Floating Over Fences

You're always on one side of the fence. Whether its the brighter side or not, you're allied to a certain position. But what happens when that all changes? When suddenly, you're the one on the other side? You're looking over and its not all that nice. I've spent years dating guys who I've never been able to commit to. The reason always changed, but the feeling remained the same - I just didn't feel it. And I never saw it from their perspective - being with someone who wasn't fully into the relationship. Well now, as karma may have tempted, I'm currently the one laying on the other side of the bed, questioning his commitment. Will he ever be completely engulfed in me as I him? Will he ever be charmed by my smile as I am with his? Maybe I don't need to question this at all because I know exactly what the green grass looks like and I'm finally seeing things the way I should've before. I should have ended things before I tethered my past boyfriends to me. I should have ended things before I could break their hearts. But I didn't. And now I'm the one who's heart is aching. Have the zooming questions and hidden tears been laying right beside me all along? Have I lead astray so many? Am I the only one to blame for my current defeat? In a world of dividers, have I become a floater?