The Future of Tomorrow

Sometimes when you date there are worries. You worry about how much you like them. You worry about how much they like you. You even worry about peeing around them. But I think I've come across the most troubling worry; the future. Should you hope for a future together? Apart? Or should we just distract ourselves from thinking about it at all? I want to picture the future together, but what if he doesn't? What if he can't even see us together in a few months, let alone graduation? I grew up on a day by day life. Taking everything a step at a time in order to handle everything. Thinking about the future back then would've made me crazy, paranoid, and scared. But now, for the first time, this is a relationship I want to daydream about. I want to think about the stupid things that we're going to fight over if we lived together. I want enact a scene in my head of the tiny apartment we can't afford and how many pillows we need. But -as there is always a but when it comes to dating- I can't see him thinking about these things. Now I should explain; I'm not thinking about marriage or kids like most girls my age. I'm not dreaming about weddings and dresses. I'm just dreaming about the future and sometimes I even dream about the future of tomorrow. Will he kiss me like our first time? Will his eyes glue to me like I hope? Will he just hug me when things go wrong? And, thankfully, the answer to those questions is yes. And that is why I picture a future with him - even if it's too soon or childish. Sometimes having something stable in your life is all you need. And I never thought the stability in my life could ever come from someone else besides myself. But maybe it can. Maybe it's already started. And maybe it's okay to dream for now, as long as I keep my mouth shut.