Willow Tree

I cry,
I shake,

He keeps me safe.
I'm silent,
I'm lost,
He wipes off my frost.
I wonder,
I stare,
He wipes away my hair.
I want him,
I need him,
But this feels grim.
Love,
Trust,
I must wipe off the dust.
He's there,
I'm here,
I want him near.
Wind,
Waves,
Bring him to my grave.
I lost myself,
I lost it all,
My grave rests where I fall.
I fall,
I died,
Just a little inside.
I wanted more,
I wanted it,
But there was nothing left that fit.
I want him to know,
I hope he understands,
That the wind pushed me like a grain of sand.
Bring him to me,
Let him see,
That he could be my willow tree.

Hallway

He stands in the hallway.

He looks into my eyes as I glide past his fragile body. 

A smile passes between us.

But we both pull away.

We both know its wrong. 

His painting drips blood, 

Mine explodes colour. 

If only he could see the colours I see. 

If only he could see the dreams I see. 

He's close to me. 

Face to face we stand intertwined. 

Chapped lips brush mine.

I can feel him. 

His face is warm.

My chest pumps blood.

His arms are strong.

My hair blows in the wind.

Opening my eyes, I see.

I see him in the hallway.

The Eyes You've Always Dreamt Of

There are some times in life that leave me wondering. They always seem to affect me in a way I can't write about. When you look back and think of what could have been. Sometimes I see myself twisting my head back, glancing over my shoulders. Wind in hair with aging trees and orange leaves as a backdrop. Sometimes I wonder. I used to wonder what would happen to me if I was stuck in an unfaithful relationship - unfortunately I no longer need to wonder. Subconsciously we all have the 'perfect' person in mind and you settle for less because you don't understand you deserve better. I settled for almost two years. But now I can look into someone's eyes who has the eyes I used to envision. I can hold his body, the one I have always wanted. Life leaves you wondering, but sometimes after a hard lesson learnt, life gives you the eyes you've always dreamt of.

Time; A Journey of Wonder

I walk around this world wondering where I'm meant to be. But sometimes I wonder if I'll find out in time, before my time runs out. What is time really? Every day the fraction becomes smaller and our days run shorter. We work so hard to achieve a world with physical objects. I want a degree, money, a man, a fit body, I want the picket-white fenced house. I want... Do we ever really consider the things we need in life that would take us further than these objects? Love, honesty, friendship, and courage are all abstracts that we realize once our time is up are worth all the time in the world. We may have a husband, or be truthful, or have friends, or be brave but can we really say that we have fully experienced these abstract notions during our time? I have truly loved? Not yet. Have I ever been completely honest? Maybe, but the next question would be what is honesty? Have I built friendships? Not true ones. Am I courageous? I don't think I ever will be. In the end, time is a rare entity and we will never get it back. The last ten minutes I spent writing this will never be brought back. Time is a journey and it is time to wonder.